I've been thinking a bit about this myself. I'm sure this behavior is due to MA3's treatment of playbacks simply as handles for the actual objects (e.g. sequences) they are controlling, and that many playbacks can be controlling the same object.
A few solutions come to mind, so MA, if you're listening, consider this a feature request:
1. Ability to "subscribe" to a playback. [Ideal.] I might be sending commands targeted at /Page2/Fader204, which may happen to control Sequence 1 (/184.108.40.206.1). Clearly I am interested in updating my own control surface's handle.. which probably knows nothing about Sequence 1 – it's just a fader addressing Page2.204. Being able to tell MA "Please send OSC messages with any changes to the path /Page2/Fader204" would allow this to work without flooding the network with redundant or unneeded messages.
2. Send ALL playback updates. [Less scalable.] In addition to OSC updates for objects (e.g. sequences) in the console, also send equivalent updates for each playback control that is assigned to it. Essentially the same as #1 but it would be for all the playbacks, not just the ones we might be interested in. Results in extra network traffic. Maybe there could be an option in the "In&Out > OSC" settings to choose whether or not to send playback statuses.
3. Ability to "query" for a playback's object. [Useful, not ideal.] If I could send an OSC message asking for the object linked to a playback, I could dynamically create a local mapping of playback handles to their objects. Now my control surface can say "tell me what's on /Page2/Fader204" and it could respond with "/Page 2/Fader204 is /220.127.116.11.1" and then I could make a lookup table on my end. Downside is that there would also need to be messages indicating when playback objects change inside of MA to keep it accurate.
4. Sending contextual responses. [Less than ideal.] We could keep receiving OSC messages whenever objects change inside of MA, referencing their object pool numbers, etc. But, if a change were triggered BY a playback handle, ALSO send an OSC message referencing that playback's path. If I move the fader at Page 2.204, also send out an OSC message with the path "/Page2/Fader204". This is not as ideal because not all playback controls that reference the same object will be reflected with the updates.